Yet Again – You probably heard it here first.Lieutenant Stanton Hoover (#3486) who has had several EEOC complaints filed against him has been demoted to work patrol. In a prior Blog, we wrote how Stan “da man” Hoover was placed as a night detective – a job that had been eliminated 5+ years ago and had mysterious reappeared on the radar to give two-timing Stan a home. Well Stan is going to be working probably the dirtiest, shittiest precinct at Central City District (#500) right off of 16th Street and I 17. From what we hear, it really doesn’t get any worse than 500.
Please note: BadPhoenixCops is offering $100 to any photo of Stan Hoover in his uniform, in a patrol car. We will offer $500 for Stan in uniform at a BEVMO! LOL!
It’s been awhile since Stan filled out a DR, worked Patrol or wore a uniform, we thought we would offer some sage advice:
1) We have to assume that those uniforms don’t fit anymore, since your began your benders at BEVMO. You may want search for larger pants. Maybe you can see if anyone has an old pair you can wear?
2) If gained a lot of weight, perhaps you can relish in the fact that bullets won’t hit you…they’ll just start orbiting around you like satellites! Just ask Benny Pena!
3) Unfortunately in that part of town, BEVMO hasn’t built any stores. Sorry. Giving all those whinos discounted liquor isn’t part of their business model. There are some fine Food City’s and Filebertos though! You might be able to meet Sheriff Joe on one of his raids! You're also closer to Los Dos Melinos so it's not all bad. We did find one BEVMO out in Goodyear and we thought we would provide you a map here http://www.bevmo.com/Misc/StoreLocator.aspx?area=stores. We found Big Deal Vodka: Ketel One Vodka 1.75ltr Only $32.99! Better stock up there pal, 500 is going to be brutal!
4) As you know the biggest problem with 500 besides the crime and random gunfire, is JP4 Fuel left by the planes. Your car will sit in the parking lot in the direct path of all planes, dumping their fuel as they land. It leaves a nice smooth coating and film on your car; think of a bundt cake, think of Heather’s chin after a night in the Maryville precinct parking lot, think of a nice glazed donut! That stuff will destroy your car so you better condom it Stan. There’s no covered parking there.
5) There’s a great park next door to 500. You can have lunch there among the prostitutes and needles! Maybe you could get a nice crack-whore or tweeker blowjob - and a bonus is tweekers have no teeth! Commander Mike Parra says they only cost $5! That's a steal!
6) Think positively Stan…it really can’t get much worse than this. Well come to think of it…its pretty fucking bad...but you could be on night duty in 500…
7) A few months ago we were visiting with a friend who worked in the building/warehouse just south of 500. Ironically, there were some cops in the back conducting some training exercises. We introduced ourselves and they said they read the site everyday and were big supporters of it. Some even admitted to posting comments. We really hope it’s comforting to know that all the hard working 20 something year old officers in 500 will be laughing at you and blogging about it here!
8) Don’t worry Stan da man, I’m sure you’ll do well dealing with 918s and putting your life on the line, like all those cops you fucked over the years. Remember when you chuckled at Dave Barnes being demoted to Patrol? Remember when you thought it was funny? Well is it funny now Stan? Trust us. We are all laughing our asses off! At least he got 900, not 500.
9) Maybe you can practice some of your sexual harassment techniques on some hookers? With the economy in the shitter, you’ll find some takers.
10) Louie Tovar and the rest of the assclowns in FIB want to personally thank you for not investigating them, when you should have. They are banding together to get you some McDonald Land Coupons for the McDonalds right off the 7th Street exit. Just don’t use the bathroom Stan, it’s an absolute fucking mess from 1000’s of homeless dudes shitting in the toilet.
11) We hope and know that you will be driving through South Phoenix, sweating your ass off, thinking about how you life went wrong and how you should have spent the time to investigate Louie Tovar and listen to a citizen who has excoriated you on a website. We really hope that is one of your biggest life regrets, along with you sexually harassing one of your female associates, Paula.
12) We have a great idea to get your career back on track Stan! Go and Find the Real Baseline Killer! We might suggest starting in Mike Polombo's garage.
13) We hear that Commander Jeoffrey Hynes is dedicating a whole chapter to you in his book titled, Thinks I Will Never Know About Leadership. The chapter is all about what not to do in a leadership position and how harassing a female in the office can lead to a demotion. It also will read how lying and being unethical can be a nice finishing touch to a career. Maybe you can write the Forward in his book? Since you both aren't very bright, 1/2 of a mind working on this book is better than only 1/4? We'll supply the crayons.
14) Did the wife leave you yet? You have an EEOC against you for sexual harassment, you’ve been demoted to patrol…she can't be liking any of that. Better hope one of your buddies isn’t visiting the ol Hoover home for some intense “interrogation methods” and some “penetrating” and “probing” questions…if you know what we mean…
15) Always remember if it gets too tough, you could always take the early retirement option like so many before you have. You may not get all your DROP money, but it may spare you some humiliation in the long run.
16) Maybe you could call PPSLA and have Lieutenant Mark Hafkey help you out? No wait - Mark's a douchbag too, he couldn't count to 21 if he were naked. Hafkey needs to worry about his own ass at this point.
Good Luck Stan. Be safe! We're all rooting for you!
16 comments:
Oh dear lord, please don't ever have me piss off BPC. Please dont ever have me mentioned on this site.
i promise to be a good cop. dont put me in 500
Amen.
I beleive Stan Hoover is one of the biggest dipshits I ever met in the Phx PD. Stan, you dontknow this but I am going to be working with you in 500 and laugh evertime I see your fat, bald ass, walking around the station looking for new pu$$y to harras.
You dont know this but word is out in 500; even the young officers are interested to see who you are.
Dear Mrs Hoover and children, I am so sorry your husband/father is such a dipshit. You must be very ashamed of him. But understand Stan began to self destruct soon after he became SAU lieutenant. His sergeants hated him so much that many trasnferred. His officers refused to allow him in the raid van when they drove up on search warrants. We would all look at Stan as he drove up all alone in his white Crown Vic while everyone else was teamed up 2 to 3 deep in their unmarked vehicles. Sound true Stan?
cont'd
cont'd
Now, lets talk about Stans sidekick Mark Hafkey. This dipshit just got PPSLA kicked out of the APA. Now, we supervisors are on our own should some type of labor management issue come up that PPSLA cannot finance the attorneys for by themseleves we are screwed, blued, and tatoo'd. When we were part of the APA, they were our fallback position financially and politically. With a stroke of a pen Mark got us unanomously voted out of the APA.
Do you want to know why Mark Hafkeys parents named him 'Mark'? Because the word 'dipshit' had already been taken by Stan Hoovers parents. This is just a joke; dont be so serious.
Sergeants and Lieutenants we need to unite right now. Lets vote these self serving bastards out of office and get some supervisors who have 'stones' in their shorts to represent us as we need to be.
Fuck you Stan Hooevr and Mark Hafkey, Oh ya, fuck you to Joe Knott you goofy Howdy Doody looking piece of shit. Since we are on the topic of dipshits lets not forget about Mike Polombo.
I walked through VCB the other day and saw Pat Kotecki and Troy Hillman. Are they looking more and more like girls or what? I cant be sure but I think Troy had eye shadow on. Heather Polombos big ass was blocking my view so I couldnt be sure if it was eye shadow or not. Could have been nothing more than the shadow created by Heathers ass.
Just so everyone knows Mark Hafkey, Stan Hoover, Joe Knott, and Troy Hilman are all on the PPSLA board. Why are we allowing this to happen? Lets get a recall going. Maybe Mark and Stan can ride around together in 500? Imagine the amount of parachute material that would be needed to assemble uniforms for these two dipshits? Alarming isnt it? Watch out US Army; you may soon be out of parachutes.
Fuck you Steve Wamsley! I saw you the other day and couldn't tell if you messed your pants or sat on a chocolate bar. Maybe it was only leakage?
News alert; Not sure about this one but I hear Mark Hafkey will become Jack the Hack's personal driver when he is recalled from PPSLA. Word is they spend so much time together already that they cannot imagine the thought of not seeing each other daily. How will Mark's big fat ass fit in that bright red corvette though? Hey Jack the Hack, nice to see you driving all of these beautiful cars while us supervisors have to drive Subarus so we can keep our kids in Community College.
Mr Pataky; when you own the city are you going to change its name to the City of Pataky? Just be careful if two boys named Pat and Troy come into your office. Tighten your belt a notch or two to keep your Ballon Knot covered at all costs!
Gotta go now. Going to take a dump at the Mcdonalds bathroom at 7st and I-17. I just hope Stan didnt beat me there and take all of the sanitary seat covers. Hate that when it happens. What should I do Steve Wamsley?
Stan need a car condom get with Heather??????????????
The views shared in this perfectly worded piece of literature is the opinion of the author and should not be construed any other way. Remeber opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one. Just some havebeen used more than others. Leakage is gross and makes my belly go thumpity-thump.
I love the song Moon River by Andy Willliams. Makes me think of those long, intimate nights in Maryvale Pct parking lot. I want the $100 reward for taking a picture of Stan but the 500 Police Aide told me all cameras were suddenly checked out this morning. None left for me. Can I just draw his picture and get a dollar or two?
SNAP!
Lets all sing;
Moon River, wider than a mile
Im crossing you in style some day.
Oh wetdream maker, you marriage breaker
Wherever you are blowing, I am cumming your way......
This deserves another 'SNAP' no not the noise Wam's shirt unifrom made the other day when he blew another button.
Only my opinion here.
Where are you Alton Washington? It is time to put Kevin Robinson in charge so he can begin clearing house. Cmon, cant ya take care of a brutha? Grow some fuckin stones and make Jack go away. Kevin is a first round draft pick. Keep him before he has enough and leaves.
Bad news sportsfans...the manager at McDonalds is going to win the $100 prize. I was just there on a call of a 418T and there was a photo of Stan posted next to the cash registers with the statement written under his photo "Bad Man. Don't Feed Him Our Crap. He Is Already Too Fat".
Then in the mensroom was the same photo but a different statement "No Sanitary Covers For This Man".
SNAP back atcha!
Is this really true about Mark Hafkey being responsible for getting us kicked out of the APA? I never received a e-mail from PPSLA about this. How can he be the voice for the membership if he doesn't communicate with us and seek our opinions on such a critical issue?
Don't ever try and "Reply to All" to any of Hafkey's e-mails so you can send your response to all other members regarding his petty bullshit e-mails. It won't work. Mark puts all of us in the "BCC" address line so if any of us members wants to "Reply to All", the only person who receives your response is Mark. Talk about control and deception!
Every PPSLA member needs to go to this website: votesean.com
Mark Halfkey, I don't want anymore of your training notice e-mails if it is true you own, or are connected in any way, to the company that puts on the training. If this is true, this is unethical and intolerable.
Signed,
Another disgusted PPSLA Member
Question to Lt Randy Force and Sgt Donny Steinmetz,
If it is true that you were with Steve Wamsley's ex-wife, how tight was she once you got past the used part?
snap?
Can someone tell me WTF SNAP means?
Sure, it is the last noise you hear when Heather puts a condom on you. The "snap" comes from the elastic ring, looks kind of like a rubberband, at the base of a condom. It "snaps" once the condom is secure and you are prepared to be orally pleasured without the worry of contracting a sexually transmitted disease from saliva, open mouth sores, lip blisters, etc. I highly recommend them.
“Kevin Robinson is a first round draft choice” who ever said that must be a boyfriend of Kevin’s or maybe the author was really Kevin himself. Robinson should be the first person who is required to leave the Police Department. The real question is how come someone with five (yes I said 5) sustained EEOC violations has not been fired years ago. He has been protected for years by the City and its time that he was forced to leave. There is no else on the police department who is as incompetent, inept, or as heavy handed as is Kevin.
He is a walking time bomb.
Wamsley....Ann was tired of going to bed with a whale and having "Green Peace", show up at her doorstep, as they responded to a call of an abused beached whale!
They should send Stan ‘Da Man’, Steve ‘Elvis’, Marcel ‘Bent Dick’, and Joe ‘balloon’ to the same precinct. If they did that they could swap stories and learn from each other. Maybe we could have a vote for who is the biggest POS and give them a plaque.
If this did happen the four of them could not eat together since this is a policy violation, right Marcel.
To answer your question (because I have met with him) Jeff doesn't want to own any city - although running for mayor or city council has crossed his mind. Could you imagine him in one of those Council meetings?
Like others have stated, he's the 1% that no one in the PPD expected. He's smarter than all of them and uses they're own policies and methods to destroy them from the inside out.
Like any good whore they will undoubted pay him a king’s ransom to make him leave; and I think many of you would be quite surprised what he said he would do with any money. He had a great lawsuit against the City, then they raided his home, which only increased his claim fourfold. These dumbshits try and use his own ex 918 wife against him and that doesn't work either.
Any cop who touched either of his claims is being sued personally based on the civil rights laws they violated. That's the show I can't wait to see! His ex better be concerned with the comparative fault aspect of his suits.
Just imagine all these assclowns assembled in one room with all their attorneys, trying to defend themselves? Can you imagine the fireworks? If the city thinks this Blog is bad now, just wait.
Then compound that with Barnes claims and his family, and Jeff's roommate (who by the way had nothing to do with any of this) who is handcuffed and detained for 3 hours, then is forced to pee in front of a houseful of cops and they take all her computer stuff?
It will be one great show.
Take the city to the cleaners. If the Mayor and Jack wont go, make them pay out the ass. The officers have had it with Jack and his ass clowns he allows to make rank. The list is long and getting longer of idiot supervisors just look at two of the newest ones that are getting Sgt. stripes Eric Wycoff (again) and Jeff Riddle. Soon we will be run by the feds and Jack will be laughing all of the way to the bank. The rest of us will be stuck cleaning up his mess.
I'm sure that Jack is to thank for PPSLA getting kicked out of the APA since Mark is a puppet for him. Good luck all of you PPSLA members now that you do not have LDF protection.
If a police officer gets his power to arrest people from the police chief how can PPD officers arrest people if we have a Public Safety Manager. Also, who gives most of us the authority to arrest since most of our commision cards are signed Harold Hurt. It would be a shame to learn that PPD officer have been making false arrests all these years.
I have set this blog as my opening homepage on my computer. i love it. The stories the comments, this is better than any show on TV, radio statio or comedy show. Thanks BPC. Keep up the humor and the great work and stick it to Jack anyway you can. When you owe the city i will come and work for you.
we miss lt haynes in deb. only lt with common sense. doesnt have little mans syndrome like you know who.
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